For the past few months I have been getting gentle nudges from the universe to take the next steps in my journey..

to put myself out there and begin building my community and tribe. I have been quietly saying yeah, yeah soon; I will do it soon!  But truthfully, fear was holding me back from that one next step.

Many of you know I was laid off from my job 14 months ago and have since spent my time changing my life direction towards following my life purpose. It has been scary, exciting, overwhelming and sometimes lonely, yet still an incredibly joyous process and I have been truly blessed to have been given the opportunity.  

That said, it has also been immensely challenging to motivate and push myself to keep going, day in day out. Pushing through fear, doubt, financial pressure, anxiety and the loneliness of being on my own every day, has been exhausting! So, it is not surprising that in the last four weeks I hit a major roadblock.  

Slowly my actions, routines and open mindset that give me the direction, courage and belief to continue began to fall by the wayside and suddenly I became the often portrayed Hollywood movie character - unemployed, lost, no focus, falling self-esteem, sloth, eating pizza and drinking beer! Well, almost!  I didn’t drink the beer!  

I started waking in the morning, wondering what the heck I was going to do for the day. I had no structure or accountability and I was floundering.  I found myself turning on the TV for distraction, playing online games, surfing the net for hours and just generally procrastinating! I began walking around in circles, treading water and, wasting time. I had lost my focus and direction.
Until yesterday, when it all came to a head!  

In the car with a friend I broke down and started to cry, “I don’t know what I’m doing. It’s too much and I don’t know how to make this work!!  I am alone, I am lonely and I am scared.” In that vulnerable moment I realised two things: one, that it felt really good to cry, to admit I wasn’t OK and to ask for help; and, two, that I had stopped doing all the things that I know take me forward towards my goals, little by little, everyday.  

So, after talking things through and getting some perspective about my thoughts, I did the first thing I know that works for me. I got off the spinning graviton, I asked my higher power for guidance and I took action.  I got out my diary and made a plan for the next 24 hours.
What an incredible difference 24 hours and an honest conversation can make! Allowing myself to be vulnerable gave me more power that I could have imagined – strange but true. So, how do I feel today? Focussed, grounded, directed, guided, connected, supported, and centred.  Still a little scared but happy and back on track!

Here is some of what I learned:

  1. No matter where you are in life and no matter what skills and knowledge you have learned, you can lose your way.

  2. Losing your way is not the issue.  It is what you do when we feel lost, what you learn and how quickly you get back on track that is important.

  3. Getting from A to B is never a straight line. There are many twists, turns, challenges and obstacles to face when you are pursuing big goals, big dreams, and incredible life changes.

  4. Pursuing mastery, not perfection, allows you to learn from everything, especially your mistakes.

  5. Being vulnerable and giving yourself permission to be human lets you experience the journey wholeheartedly with courage, kindness and compassion.

The one thing I did in the very early days of this journey was give myself the permission to be human. In truth it was the greatest gift!  It means that I don’t have to be perfect and I don’t have to strive for perfection.  
The journey back to following my life purpose has affirmed that it is my mindset - how I view my success and my ‘failure’ - which allows me to positively grow and develop everyday. Positive psychology coaching has taught me that all life experiences, good, bad, ugly or indifferent, have something to share if I am willing to learn.  By striving for excellence rather than perfection I have sometimes taken the long and winding road, made mistakes, failed and fallen over but I have learned incredible things about life, including how to be a better coach, change agent and human being.

I hope that by sharing my own experience I have shown that we are all the same and suffer the same insecurities and feelings of vulnerability. If you want help to overcome challenges and difficulties in your own journey, if you have big dreams and don’t know where to start or how to follow them or if you would like strategies to help you through those times of doubt, book a FREE session with me to see if coaching is right to help you take the next steps in your own amazing journey.

To love and be loved is to feel the sun from both sides. David Viscott